This is an open letter to “the girl we always see out with dad”,
I’m fairly confident you are the same person as the one who he said “totally gets me in every way” and i know exactly who you are. I know i appeared to stand there rather idly while i literally watched you walk away with my husband last year. In fact, in hindsight, i was actually rather kind to you. I knew where to find you and how to contact you if i had wanted to. But i choose to take the high road and take you out of the equation. Even now, i really don’t give a shit that you are probably happily playing little wifey with him. Seriously, you can have him. Good luck to you, i’m so over him that i can barely stand to look at his face the one time a week i have to see him.
But if you think i am going to stand here just as quietly while i watch you go out with him and play happy families with MY children together you have seriously mistaken me. You obviously both think you are fricken geniuses by not actually telling the kids your name, like I’m an idiot and will just presume it’s a different person. Or that they are idiots and won’t add two and two together eventually.
I actually feel quite sorry for you, because you see, what you think is a kind generous man…is fake. It’s all pretend. Everything he displays to anyone is fake. He is acting and pretending and you have been sucked into his narcissistic drama. It’s what he does. How he rolls. How he has always been and will always continue to be. He pretends until the people around him realize that he is full of shit and then he moves on and finds other friends.
In the immortal words of Dr Phil, the best indicator of future behavior is past behavior, and trust me…he does not have a good track record.
He has probably done a pretty good job at warping your opinion of me by now. I’m sure he has probably described me as “insane” or “pathetic”. He has probably made me out to be a total lunatic “crazy bitch” so, if on the very remote chance either of you are even reading this, you’ve probably already formed you “omg i can’t believe how pathetic and jealous she sounds” argument. I know this because it is another thing that he does to build himself up to be the good guy. But really i’m not, if you ask anyone who really knows me, i’m actually very normal and quite rational. But i am also very very pissed off and i can make your lives a living hell if i want. And skipping around playgrounds and going on fun play dates with my children is a very very quick way to make me not impressed.
Never mind the fact that you are frolicking around with my husband (oh yes, technically he is still my husband), you are also robbing my children of the very limited one on one time they have with their father. They want to spend time with HIM they don’t want to share that time with “daddys friend who we see all the time”. They shouldn’t have to compete for his attention with you, so piss off.
What he does with you now, he will eventually do to you with someone else. And my children, no matter how pretty and fun he paints you to be, will always be my children. And as soon as they realize how full of shit he is they will run as fast and far away as i have. On top of that, i will be very shocked and astounded (and happily eat my own words) if he EVER agrees to settling down and having more kids. So if your plans are long term, you may as well cut the whole bouncing baby thing out of them now. The gorgeous little one year old he parades around in front of you and everyone else like a toy..he never wanted and completly ignored and pretended didn’t exist while i was pregnant.
I am responsible for that gorgeous little boy and that beautiful blond girl and that smart and funny almost nine year old. They are all who they are courtesy of me because i have raised them. He may have been there in person for most of their lives but he was NOT there in spirit. I have done everything for them from wiping their snot and bums to teaching them to crawl, walk, talk, read, dance and play.
I will always be mummy, you will always be “daddy’s friend” and he will never change.
All the best.
the one he promised to love and protect forever.
(apparently his version of forever was not the same as my version of forever)